Monday, 8 December 2008

Black people I do hate ...

What I love about Rap , is the high brow intellectual discourse .

Nothing announces the “new age of intellectual enlightenment” quite like a man in a big fur coat , surrounding by gyrating ass .

Nothing .

Forget the angry street politics of N.W.A and the like .Rap has it's new champions, and 50 cent and the like sit on the “diamond encrusted, dosed in “dom perignon” throne.

Social issues are so , like , yesterday , and have been replaced by the revolutionary causes more closely reflecting the hubris of our time , namely : Ass and money.

Sure , some people may pine for the days when we basked in the illusion that there was more to life than mere “getting money so that you can surround yourself with more ass”. But While we were off “ranting” about our “social inequality” , “violence culture” and “cold hard capitalistic foreign policies” etc , 50 cent was “keeping it real".

And now he has Che Guevaraesque come to show us the way. The “real” way. Blessed be.

You see, 50 has shown us the error of our ways. Exposed the rotten seeds that were at the core of our “values”. Rather than formulate a society, based on equality and personal responsibility, 50 propagates instead the revolutionary idea of “let make money, f#ck and tell everyone about it” instead.


It's comforting to know the kids have such high brow ideas to emulate. Society is in good hands.

Well that's one way to look at it.

Here's another.

50 cent is a Jerk.

50 cents raps about having women AND money. What a redundant waste of information. Anyone who has seen the quality of women who surround 50 cents , and then by mistake panned to the horrible mistake of nature , he has for an excuse of a face , immediately would assume he has money.

50 cents , let's face it , is butt ugly . I only say that to insult butts. I've seen Australians who are better looking than 50 cents , and it's common knowledge Australian exist merely as testament to god's sense of satirical humor.

50 cent hangs out with a group of men , who are all very body conscious , extremely interested in “ass” , wear fur coats and can dance .They call themselves the “G- unit .

No points for guessing what the “G” stands for . It stands for GAY .

50 cents is the Elton John of the rap world.

Yup 50 cents sure sucks. Sucks cock. If you use the fact that he hangs around women as evidence that he is straight , you aren't looking at how he treats the women. I suppose some people might say he has a subtle approach to picking up women , some people , like rapists.

Talking about rape .

Some people say 50 cents music is “rapping art .”

I say ....”that's one too many “p's” .

And don't get me started on R Kelly.


Mberenis said...

Obama did it for us! There is a bailout for the people. Everyone qualifies. I got $750,000.00USD in grants for my bailout.

Bailout for the People

Anonymous said...

PRETORIA. Power utility Eskom has denied that it shelved plans to build new nuclear power stations because senior management feared the reactors would "turn staff into mutant were-lizards", instead citing rising costs. It has also announced plans to slash costs by producing no electricity in 2009, which is slightly more than it produced in 2007.

Addressing journalists at Eskom's headquarters in Megawatt Park this morning, spokesman Megawattwatt Mopanyana conceded that senior management were relieved that the nuclear option had become too expensive.

"Obviously we understood the basic physics of nuclear energy," said Mopanyana. "But some grey areas remained.

"For example, senior management was never clear on how severely one needed to be bitten by a radioactive spider to be given superpowers.

"Also if you are trapped inside the reactor during a planetary alignment, is it the new fuel rods or the spent ones that make you grow raptor wings and develop x-ray vision?"

However he vehemently denied that senior management had feared that reactor workers would be transformed into were-lizards, adding that they had consulted with reptile experts from the Johannesburg Zoo who had confirmed that any such transformation was highly unlikely and had only been recorded on one occasion, at a Kurt Darren concert on the East Rand.

Mopanyana also used the opportunity to urge South Africans to continue conserving electricity, saying that they would need to start cutting their energy usage "by about 100 percent" from next year.

"We at Eskom are painfully aware of the current global economic slump," he said. "Which is why we've not only shelved our nuclear plans but all plans involving the generation of electricity by any means."

He said that it was time to embrace "electrical ubuntu".

"Basically what this translates as is 'I am cooking over a candle because you are cooking over a candle'.

"And if we're both cooking over a candle, we're not using expensive and polluting electricity.

"Ultimately we all win.

"But not as much as senior management, who will still get their bonuses."

Anonymous said...

PRETORIA. The ruling ANC has slammed the ruling ANC, saying that the ANC should leave the Springbok emblem alone, while the ANC has hit back saying that the ANC should not meddle with the ANC's policy regarding the iconic symbol. However both agreed that with an election looming it is time once again to threaten to abolish the Springbok before magnanimously saving it.

The controversy first erupted last week when Parliament's portfolio committee on sport and recreation, tasked with issuing divisive and racially charged statements prior to national elections, once again promised to abolish the Springbok rugby emblem.

The committee, which is chaired by former male model and society dame Butana Komphela, compared the Springbok to the Nazi swastika.

It has not yet explained whether or not this implies that Nelson Mandela, who famously donned Francois Pienaar's Springbok jersey at the World Cup in 1995, is a Nazi collaborator.

The threats were welcomed by most commentators.

"As long as Komphela is making racist statements and threatening white sports, democracy is safe," said political analyst Sparletta Mahlangu.

"It shows we have a functioning electoral system, and that we're going into the normal pre-election cycle of the ANC whipping up some anti-white sentiment to distract the masses from their current anti-black sentiment."

Meanwhile spokespeople for both the ANC and the ANC said that the attack on the Springbok and subsequent defence were part of the party's ongoing mandate to tell the electorate what to think.

"The ANC's research has shown very clearly that whites are fairly simple creatures," said spokesman Brooklax Dandala.

"They like cooking meat over open flames, listening to accordions, having sex with black char ladies called Elsie or Gladys, and denying paternity of the offspring.

"Sometimes they do this all at the same time, which is awesome."

However, he added, new research had shown that white people also liked emigrating to Australia with all their money, which was why it was important for the ANC to make a show of defending things white people cared about.

"Threatening to abolish the Springbok before generously defending it sends out a really clear message to whites: 'please don't take your tax revenue overseas'."

He added that if the tactic worked well the ANC might expand it to other things whites cared about.

However he would not confirm or deny that this might entail threatening to banish Steve Hofmeyr to Robben Island before pardoning him and allowing him to play his accordion while sitting on Jacob Zuma's knee.

Anonymous said...

hey rooster

i saw the new nandos ad where you can pick meal a and c

pretty clever

Anonymous said...

Some of the comments are off the topic. Look - 50 Cent does what he does because that is what sells hip-hop records. I would personally prefer if he used his talent for more socially conscious rap, like Public Enemy used to do or at least Kanye West.

Anonymous said...

Thats it. You are a Fucking idiot. You have lost all credibility with this article.

Get a real life, you fuckin stupid Wanna-be-Kaffir.

Anonymous said...

kayne west is a super rascist

finished and klaar

Anonymous said...

Kanye West is a racist? Get real.

islandshark said...

Rooster, for once we agree on something.

Not that you probably care, but anyway.