You see apartheid officially ended in very early 1990's. Around the time three boys from seattle named nirvana were about the rip the assholes out of the cock rockers of the 80's. It was the dawning of a new era for music.....and what a festid putrid cultural pool it was coming from.
The 1980's you see.....was crap.
For all you South African's "sentient" during and responsible for the 80's ....hold your head in shame . Came across this Saffer advert for a Toyota corolla from 1983 .....
Moonwalking. In tracksuits. More than once ? Legally ?
Fuck the border war...if I was old enough I would have emmigrated for this advert alone . And thank god my parents manage to have me before this came out...after seeing those tracksuits and dance moves surely all sexual activity screeched to a pre-ABS halt mere nano-seconds after this advert aired .
Come on guys..."go one better !" Not setting the challenge fucking bar up very high now are you Toyota ? I suppose it's only fair to expect this of a nation where one can buy a teenage girls used panties from a vending machine. The japanese.....if not for Reon Kadena and Maria Ozawa there'd be no use for them.
I wrote before about the television of the 1980's in my old site (http://www.fingerandthumb.blogspot.com )....but it might be worth repeating to help make my point...
I grew up in dark , dark times . It's wasn't quite the “black plague” or anything ....but it was just as traumatic : The 1980's .
"Flipper" (also known as " Stupid smiling fish with a hole in it")
When one considers that Dolphins are nothing more than gay sharks , one is reminded of a certain Dolphin named “flipper” . Except of course even for a dolphin flipper was extremely gay . Imagine that dolphins had TV shows , flipper would be the blonde guy in queer eye for the straight guy . He'd have the technology and he could rebuild you . Dry your tears . Well fuck you flipper ! Fuck you and your opinions on fashion !
Stupid flipper . Hey guys , I wonder how flipper will solve this weeks sea bound problem ? Maybe , just maybe , it will involve jumping high out the water . Or perhaps , just perhaps , he'll manipulate his environment using his nose . Mind blowingly it could involve a third option , flipper making annoying clicking dolphin noises . Wow , no wonder they made this show for kids . The fragile adult just couldn't handle it without mass over excitement fueled heart attacks
In fairness flipper was a “show” that ran from 1964-1967 , but thanks to S.A.B.C it was forced on my youth anyway . If it wasn't for Margot that slutty , sexy , flirty weather girl , I'd never have forgave them .
My little pony . (Also known as " Horn ass fuckers " )
My little pony wasn't a show so much a series of manipulative adverts used to market and a sell a product (I'm not actually joking) . That's all good and fine , as so was “He-man” . He-man however was awesome . The toys could do cool stuff like shag barbie and parachute . My little pony could only do crap girlie stuff like get it's mane and tail brushed . It's no wonder all you girls are so dumb with only that to stimulate your minds . I suppose My little ponies could do one cool thing , as I often demonstrated to the girls in my class : Melt . But even that they could only do once .
Then , in a cruel blow of fate I was banned from playing with fire .
Anyway , besides the toys being crap . the show was awful and basically about sex . God knows what they did with those horns .
Stupid 1980's . We should have killed it when we had the chance .
Ah that's a good laugh and all, they make some bad tv shows today too. I've ad my say about 7de laan and pop idols, so the verdict is still out there. But there is an element however that lances deep and sucks out all of the marrow of anything even resebling humour....South African music of the 1980's....
Now firstly music came in two forms.....you could get it on a vinyl disk, which for the kids is like an ethiopian frisbee...or a tape.
..........and that children....is all we have time for today.......