Wednesday 15 October 2008

The 1980's : crap

I grew up in dark , dark times . It's wasn't quite the “black plague” or anything ....but it was just as traumatic : The 1980's .

There were many things that sucked in the 1980's. Aparthied...Steve Hoffmeyer, The Kmer Rouge genocide. All equal bad ...but what really took the crap cake about being a child in the 1980's was of course the shitty children's tv shows .Try as you may , who could forget the little blue minions of hell that were “the Smurfs" ?


"Flipper" (also known as " Stupid smiling fish with a hole in it")

When one considers that Dolphins are nothing more than gay sharks , one is reminded of a certain Dolphin named “flipper” . Except of course even for a dolphin flipper was extremely gay . Imagine that dolphins had TV shows , flipper would be the blonde guy in queer eye for the straight guy . He'd have the technology and he could rebuild you . Dry your tears . Well fuck you flipper ! Fuck you and your opinions on fashion !



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Stupid flipper . Hey guys , I wonder how flipper will solve this weeks sea bound problem ? Maybe , just maybe , it will involve jumping high out the water . Or perhaps , just perhaps , he'll manipulate his environment using his nose . Mind blowingly it could involve a third option , flipper making annoying clicking dolphin noises . Wow , no wonder they made this show for kids . The fragile adult just couldn't handle it without mass over excitement fueled heart attacks


In fairness flipper was a “show” that ran from 1964-1967 , but thanks to S.A.B.C it was forced on my youth anyway . If it wasn't for Margot that slutty , sexy , flirty weather girl , I'd never have forgave them .


My little pony . (Also known as " Horn ass fuckers " )


My little pony wasn't a show so much a series of manipulative adverts used to market and a sell a product (I'm not actually joking) . That's all good and fine , as so was “He-man” . He-man however was awesome . The toys could do cool stuff like shag barbie and parachute . My little pony could only do crap girlie stuff like get it's mane and tail brushed . It's no wonder all you girls are so dumb with only that to stimulate your minds . I suppose My little ponies could do one cool thing , as I often demonstrated to the girls in my class : Melt . But even that they could only do once .



Then , in a cruel blow of fate I was banned from playing with fire .


Anyway , besides the toys being crap . the show was awful and basically about sex . God knows what they did with those horns .

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Believe it or not white South Africans were even more stupid and lame during aparheid....and get this.....their dancing was even worse !!!





Now if you ask me moonwalking is bad enough.,but moonwalking in tracksuits ???!! What combination of mega strength crazy pills must people have been on to have made that advert and have expected people not to want to kill them ? If you asked me the Americans were supporting the whiteys..but one day someone knocked on Raegens door with a betamax recording of this in a panic .....and it was the final straw. If this advert was made today , you could probably garner support from the ku klux klan for Uhuru !!!

Stupid 1980's . We should have killed it when we had the chance .

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I agree. The 80had some really crappy TV shows. I think it was those black ones that actually opened my eyes. The likes of the Cosby show, who tried to portray blacks as succesful and equal to whites. What a load of junk. Funny how those black women always had straightened hair and how the actresses were always chosen with lighter complexions, because the real black is too black to appear on the screen. All you see is teeth and eyes. The 80's were the time of indoctrination via TV to convince us of this Multiculturial crap that is telling us blacks are not only the equals of Whites, they are better. BULLSHIT!!!

The Rooster said...

W're not all educated so I'll be leniet on your blunders. But just so next time you don't make a fool of yourself , you might want to reflect upon the universal truth that people who feel superior never feel the need to validate it or point it out. It's only those with gross inferiority and insecurity complexes who do. It all makes me think you have a small dick or something.

The Rooster said...

So out of pity and compassion I forgive you brother. A small winky must be a hard thing to bare.

Anonymous said...

Hahahah. Your blog's always a hoot. The 80's were really crappy. Wasted a lot of time - 4 years in total - can never get this lost time back. "Diensplig & kampe." For what? Who can I sue for lost time? Maybe there should be a class action suite for this lost time?

Anonymous said...

What a joke because if it were not for this hated decade (more hatred here AGAIN this time against an intangible past time-line) then your buddies would not have inherited the illegal macro State during the next decade as it was the machinations of the 80s which lead to the actions of the 90s. Though I do agree for various reasons that this decade should never have happened.